I realize I spend the majority of my life waiting for things to “settle down”. Does anyone else do this? You think to yourself, “Things will finally be calm once [insert life change here] is behind me. Then I can enjoy life.”
For me it’s mostly about moving. Once we move to North Carolina, once I finish college, once we move back to NC. Once we get married, once we get to Georgia, once we move here, there, and everywhere. Once we own the house. Once Avery is born. Then I can enjoy. Then I’ll sit back and be grateful for all that I have.
Listening to the It’s Not Supposed to be This Way online bible study video this morning, Lysa talks about the messy middle- this life we find ourselves in between the garden of Eden and the eternity of heaven.
Living in the messy middle between two gardens is so trying at times.Lysa Terkeurst
The truth is things are never going to “settle down” here in the messy middle. Things are going to continue coming at us, things that are both bad and good and sometimes both. Cars are going to break down and cars will be bought, moves will be made, houses purchased and sold, jobs left and jobs offered. Things are not going to calm down long enough for me to feel at peace and thankful for all that my life is on my own.
Therefore my peace has to come from elsewhere, and for that I need God. I need to wrestle well with my feelings and my faith in Him. In the video, Lysa goes on to say, “When you process with the truth of God, don’t start with the hard feelings and find the way to truth. Don’t process from the tangled places of our hearts but start with the goodness of God and let that be the perspective by which we process our feelings.”
I need to thank God for the blessing of Avery’s life, no matter how short his time on earth. I can allow myself to feel all the emotions of missing him but those feelings won’t impact my faith that God will make all things new.
He will wipe away every tear from their eyes and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain, anymore for the former things have passed away. “Behold, I am making all things new!”Revelation 21.4,5
And until then, I believe He wants me to learn to enjoy life in the messy middle.
Father, I know the story you’re writing for me is so much better than any story I could ever write for myself.It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way, introduction